September is suicide awareness month, but Jannen Wardie has been working to bring attention to suicide and mental health issues year-round. Janeen lost her son Zechariah to suicide and the heartbreaking loss has propelled her into a life of advocacy and empathy as chairwoman for American Foundation for Suicide Prevention’s Out Of The Darkness walk. Suicide has affected most people in one way or another and it’s a pain that doesn’t callous; it will never not be overwhelmingly sad to hear of someone losing their life to suicide. Members of the community came out this past Saturday at The Open Space in Traverse City for AFSP’s Out Of The Darkness walk to honor those that they have lost to suicide, to support those who have lost someone, and to show solidarity with those who struggle with their own mental health battles.
Last year’s Out Of The Darkness walk was a success, drawing upwards of 700 people. This year’s walk drew people from all over Northern Michigan and across the country. Booths were set up to provide snacks, face painting, balloon turtles and a station where people could write down what they will do to share happiness.
The booth put on by #HappyActs featured a Happiness Wall where Out Of The Darkness attendees wrote how they would share happiness on a piece of paper and stuck it to the wall. Answers ranged from simple, ‘be kind to others’ and ‘spreading positivity’ to more thought-provoking like, ‘forgiving my family’ and ‘caring about the answer to “how are you.”’
There was also a sign making station where attendees wrote heartfelt messages, either to the loved one lost or to a person struggling with their own mental health.
Something that I found touching were the friends and family that wore shirts dedicated to the loved one they lost to suicide. The first family I saw in matching shirts were the McCains who were there in honor of the son they lost, Earl McCain IIII. His father attended the walk last year and returned this year.
“I lost my son last April,” Earl McCain III said. “I was moved by the event last year. The amount of people that’s wearing the same shoes as me.”
Earl attended last year’s event alone, but left with many new friends. This year he came to the event with his family.
“I think this is a beautiful cause and I think it’s about time we start talking about the mental issues going on in our country.”
There was so much beauty at the event. People were quick to smile at a stranger, to start a conversation with a stranger, to embrace a stranger. Before the walk started the MC asked everybody to face West Front Street and yell the name of the person they were thinking of. Seeing a woman smiling through her tears in the middle of the crowd after she screamed her person’s name was jarring and emotional.
The walk itself was gentle. There were no hard edges, no one pushing to get in front of each other, no Sunday supermarket brisk paces. Just walking in the sunshine and giving a smile or a nod to other walkers, or drivers cheering on walkers. There was a strong feeling of peace and solidarity walking with strangers bound by a common experience and feeling, which is exactly what Janeen hoped to get out of the walk.
“It’s a walk for hope,” Janneen said. “We want people to leave feeling hopeful and feeling like they’re not alone because they’re not. If they feel stuck right now we hope that being here today will help them walk out of that spot that they’re in and move forward.”
When I arrived at Out Of The Darkness it was chilly and overcast but when the walk started an hour later the sun burst through, and the poetry of that was not lost on me. Janeen wants everyone to know that even though struggling with mental health can feel like being stuck in the dark, there is an end in sight and there are always people there to help.
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